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101 Ways to THANK a Military Spouse

Happy Military Spouse Appreciation Day! In honor of the spouses that work so hard on the home-front, here is a list of 101 Ways to Thank a Military Spouse!

It is about Respect, Love, Admiration, Appreciation, and a simple Thank You.

  1. A simple “Thank You for Serving, too”
  3. Take the time to *listen* She may not have had an adult conversation for quite some time!
  4. Don’t assume HE is not a military spouse. Thank the military-husbands too.
  5. Pick up something at the store that reminds you of her; a potted-plant, a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine, nail-polish & nail files, etc etc
  6. Give her a call! Say ‘Thank You’ and find out how her day is going.
  7. A day at the spa!
  8. FREE child-care. Watch her children for her. Let her do something on her own.
  9. Invite her out for a local-sight-seeing tour. She might not know the area & enjoy learning.
  10. Equip her.
  11. Take a spouse out for coffee or tea.
  12. Pray for him. Pray for her.
  13. Make a fancy-drink. Pour two glasses. One for you, one for her. Make toasts and enjoy together.
  14. *Give* him a book from your book-shelf that you enjoyed.
  15. Offer to wash her car (Don’t forget to vacuum)
  16. Business-owners: Host a special event just for spouses, don’t do it for monetary gain.
  17. Do you garden? Bring her some of your produce; flowers, fruits, vegetables.
  18. Give her personal space to miss her loved one. Then open-up your arms to take her in.
  19. Gather your mutual-friends. Have a multi-family picnic.
  20. If she calls asking for something, a cup of milk, some eggs, potatoes etc etc Lend with a cheerful heart and don’t expect your ‘gift’ back!
  21. Buy her a military-spouse shirt. Have it shipped to her:
  22. Find a military-spouse book she might enjoy:
  23. Plan a play-date at your house. Get the kids together and enjoy the day.
  24. Sit with him at church. Not many enjoy sitting in the pew alone.
  25. Take a picture. Send it in an email to her.
  26. Offer to help with yard-work!
  27. Give her privacy if you sense she does not want to open up.
  28. Send her a quick note (on hand-made stationary if you are feeling crafty).
  29. Say Thank You with food. Its the way to our heart!
  30. Send her an email, let her know you miss her if you haven’t seen each other in awhile.
  31. If you haven’t seen her for some time because of distance look at the calendar. When can you visit? Don’t always expect her to do the travelling home.
  32. Get excited over something he is excited about!
  33. Take her children to the park. Ask if she WANTS to come to. Some spouses like time alone; others want adult-company. It might just depend on her mood.
  34. Give him a genuine smile; remember, a smile is worth a thousand words!
  35. Compliment her children
  36. Send an anonymous note of encouragement
  37. Do you have a favorite magazine? Send her a subscription
  38. Call her up. Ask if she wants to go out and get some ice-cream!
  39. Run across a funny comic-strip or joke that reminded you of him? Clip it and send in a letter.
  40. Do you see a new face in the crowd? She might be a new-spouse. Go over and introduce yourself.
  41. If a seasoned-spouse does something that makes you feel welcomed, say Thank You. It’ll make her feel good, too.
  42. Business Owners: Offer a Military-Discount (List it on
  43. Don’t assume she knows that you appreciate her sacrifice as a military-spouse. Say it.
  44. Organizations: Host a special military-spouse tea. It doesn’t have to be ‘fussy’, just fun!
  45. If you are standing in line at the commissary and she is behind you with a cart full of food, fussy babies & screaming toddlers let her go in front of you. *Everyone* may say Thank You.
  46. Say good-things about her spouse, the service-member. It can feel like a reflection of her.
  47. Are you the service-member? Wash your spouse’s feet. What a humbling, gratifying act for the woman (or man!) you love so much.
  48. Give her a list of things she has done for you. Take 5 minutes and make a list of 10 to 50 things you love about her.
  49. Appreciate that “How are you holding up” isn’t always the best question to ask the spouse of a deployed service member!
  50. Make her a CD full of all the songs that remind you of her. Keep it cheery!
  51. Don’t forget the Military Husband! Include him while planning spouse-functions
  52. Pick up a bottle of bubble bath. Deliver it with a small note of appreciation.
  53. Respect her decisions. If she says she can’t do it let her ‘no be no’.
  54. Give to Operation Showers of Appreciation for ‘expecting’ moms with deployed spouses:
  55. Offer a simple-hug. Amazing what ‘touch’ can do to heal the soul. But respect personal space if that is an issue.
  56. Go to an art-class together. Many bases have an Art-Shop, or find a local business where you can make jewelry or paint-ceramics together.
  57. Take him out to a ball game; either a local pro- or semi-pro. Buy him a beer and a hot dog. And enjoy the evening!
  58. Are her kids sick? Is SHE sick? Offer to help. Bring over chicken-noodle soup. Run to the store for some 7-Up. Find out what she needs.
  59. Service-members: Help her with the laundry! Help put it away without being asked.
  60. Did she make a dish for a social-gathering? Compliment her. Ask for the recipe! Tell someone that is near you how good it is.
  61. Contact your local Television or Radio Station. Do *they* know it is Military Spouse Appreciation Day?
  62. Don’t forget to say ‘Please’ if you need her. She is probably juggling quite a bit at once. She will appreciate being asked, as opposed to told.
  63. Chamber of Commerce: Host a special city-wide event for your military families. (Place your event on at your closest installations to get the word out.)
  64. Take the time to find out how his weekend was. Where the family went, what they did, how his son’s baseball game was.
  65. Show her politeness, thoughtfulness and helpfulness. Open the door for her, pick up something she dropped.
  66. Service-member: Buy “a little something” for the bedroom that you know s/he’ll enjoy. ;)
  67. Help her start a hobby. As an example, if you scrapbook offer to help her get started if she is interested.
  68. Businesses: Hold a contest that will benefit the military spouse like, “Laptops for Flattops” (
  69. Service-member: Whisper sweet-nothings in your spouse’s ear. Tell him how much you appreciate him.
  70. Help her children make an “I Love You, Mom” card. Get artsy with glitter and glue and construction paper.
  71. Make some cookies with your kids & have them deliver them. Teach your own children gratitude for our military-families. She will appreciate it.
  72. Do you make cards? Send blank ones to @cardsforheroes. They send them to deployed soldiers to can send a note home on – a treasure for a military spouse!
  73. A very simple, heartfelt thank you means the world. Oh, and donuts too.
  74. Businesses: Contact your installations Family Service Center and find out what you can do for the families on base. (
  75. Invite him over for a game on TV. Sit back and enjoy a beer together.
  76. When cooking dinner, make enough for two families. Bring half to a military-family or invite their family over.
  77. Benefit Of The Doubt. A little BOTD can go a long way to show your appreciation for the military-spouse.
  78. Make an acrostic with his/her name filled with adjectives about their strengths.
  79. Flexibility is the name of game. Be flexible in making plans. Things happen out of her control.
  80. When thanking a soldier for their service, thank their spouse, too!
  81. Play a game of catch with her children. They may be missing the presence of a man in their life.
  82. Businesses: Have a special gift for all the military spouses that come through your door; a key chain, a nail file, keep it simple.
  83. Hit a mid-day movie together. Buy a large popcorn to share!
  84. Invite her to a bible-study at your church. What a great way to meet new people!
  85. Grab the strollers and take a walk together!
  86. Servicemen – Buy her favorite lotion and give her a back rub.
  87. Businesses – Having a special contest? Ask a military spouse to be a judge. She’ll be honored.
  88. Call, Send an email, leave a comment to her/him. Sometimes the smallest gesture means much more than you think.
  89. Service-member: Sign up for dance classes with your spouse.
  90. Take time to get to know HER/HIM. He/she is more than a military spouse.
  91. Do you have a friend you know she would enjoy knowing? Introduce them!
  92. Do they have a green-thumb? Give a potted plant. “Bloom where you are planted” and a note that says thanks
  93. Invite him over for a bbq on a Friday night!
  94. Businesses: Do you see the flash of her ID when she makes a transaction? Be sure to say Thank you for her service!
  95. Military Spouse in the family? Laminate a special card with the families’ phone numbers, addresses, birthdays. Help her keep organized.
  96. Service-Member: Take Leave on your anniversary. Do something special together.
  97. Do you have a pool (or just a slip-n-slide!) invite the military-family over. Have a big pitcher of lemonade ready!
  98. Plan a girls’ day… manicures, pedicures and lunch!
  99. Create a Themed box or basket for her. Drop it off at her door anonymously with a note of appreciation.
  100. Businesses: Encourage your colleagues to offer a meaningful military-discount. Make yourself a town that appreciates the military!
  101. Make her stop, breathe, and ASK “How can I help?” and then do it.


Friday 15th of May 2009

Followed you from SITS... great Post!! I'll have to use some of your ideas to support our military families!! Thanks!


Friday 15th of May 2009

This is an awesome list, I did not know about this holiday! Thank you for sharing!

P.S. - I left something special for you on my blog. It might just be an award for you!


Friday 8th of May 2009

I love this post, if i lived near ya we would go on a cupcake trek! :P

Anywho from one military spouse (my hubs is a vet) to another.. *hugs hun*

Sassypants Wifey

Friday 8th of May 2009

Great list, I had no idea this day existed, lol. This should be broadcast everywhere... Maybe I will treat myself to a new shirt. Happy Military Spouse appreciation day!


Friday 8th of May 2009

That is a great post! I hope someone is doing some of these things for you!